El viejo al que enseguida reconocí como mi profesor de Formación Moral y Cívica, se me acercó en la fila de los impuestos, apuntándome con el índice al pecho:
―¿Usted es…?
Lo miré desconcertado. Le dije mi nombre.
―¡Claro! ―chasqueó los dedos―¡Ya me parecía! Usted fue alumno del San Esteban. Alumno mío. Gastaldo, soy yo. ¿Se acuerda?
Cómo no iba a acordarme. Uno no se olvida así nomás de tipos como Gastaldo. Recordaba, en particular, una de sus clases; pero además recordaba la vozarrona insigne, y ese gesto marcial que todavía conservaba después de veinticinco años. Le miré la piel manchada, dragada de arrugas, los ojos grises y violentos. Tenía puesto un saco raído y una camisa de cuello alto y anticuado. Pero mantenía un aspecto erguido y saludable, a pesar de que ya andaría por los ochenta.
El tiempo que estuvimos en la fila sólo habló él, exagerando melancolías hacia el Colegio, recordando a colegas muertos, etc. Renegó un poco de su condición de jubilado y me mostró un audífono amarillo y grasiento que tenía hundido en la oreja derecha, porque desde hacía un tiempo escuchaba muy mal. Afortunadamente, llegó mi turno en la caja y pude despedirme. El viejo me apretó fuerte la mano, haciéndome sonar los dedos. Después, se escurrió entre la gente y desapareció.
Ver a Gastaldo esa mañana me despertó el recuerdo de alguien más, inevitablemente asociado a él, y que fue el verdadero protagonista del episodio que ahora voy a narrar. Esa misma noche, en casa, busqué una caja donde guardaba algunas fotos de secundaria. Las desparramé sobre la mesa. Revolví.
Fui mirando las fotos como si fuesen del pasado de otro, sin que llegaran a provocarme emociones ni nostalgias. Éramos siempre los mismos, veinte o treinta, que nos repetíamos todos los años con idénticas diferencias. No pude asociar muchos nombres a ese torbellino de rostros exaltados: llevábamos pantalón gris, camisa blanca y corbata bordó brillante, que los más atrevidos usaban floja por debajo del primer botón. Las fotografías de fin de curso nos mostraban como lo que éramos: un rebaño de pavotes que se proclamaban rebeldes a fuerza de ser, paradójicamente, todos iguales. Eran los ochenta y no había mucho que reprochar: muchos de nuestros padres ya se portaban del mismo modo.
En eso estaba pensando cuando, en una foto de fin de curso, ubiqué, por fin, a Gastaldo. Estaba parado sobre el margen derecho del cuadro, macizo, arrogante, ya por entonces calvo, con un traje azul y los brazos cruzados sobre el pecho. Era notablemente más alto que la hilera de alumnos que habían ubicado de pie. Me busqué a mí mismo y me encontré algunas cabezas a la izquierda, en cuclillas, sosteniendo el extremo de un cartel escrito en tiza: «Colegio San Esteban, 2do. Año, 1984». A mi lado, un pibe de flequillo miraba algún lugar incierto del patio. Y en el extremo de la fila, debajo de Gastaldo, estaba él: Rodrigo.
Rodrigo Santamaría. Lo recordé bien, asociándolo de inmediato a la figura ciclópea del profesor que justo detrás suyo se levantaba como una torre. Entonces supe por qué me había esforzado en olvidar a Gastaldo, y por qué ahora, veinticinco años después, recordaba a Santamaría mejor que a ningún otro.
En comparación con los demás, Rodrigo era un chico particular. Y no sólo por su aspecto pálido, contraído y excesivamente delgado: Rodrigo vivía acurrucado sobre sí mismo, con los ojos inquietos y en guardia, como quién todo el tiempo está esperando un golpe. Al caminar, sus hombros recogidos, sus codos huesudos y abiertos, le daban un aire de erizo infranqueable. Le tenía miedo al mundo y se notaba.
Sin embargo, como suele ocurrir en estos casos, era el mejor alumno del curso. Un genio, para cuanta disciplina se le presentara. Recuerdo que era brillante en Historia; que fue el primero en resolver, sin ayuda de nadie, una ecuación diferencial, y el único que podía dar cuenta del Quijote porque lo había leído completo, de cabo a rabo, a diferencia de nosotros, los falaces.
Pero si algo lo hacía extraño era que hablaba muy poco. Casi nada. Contestaba, a duras penas, con monosílabos, y eso en sus mejores días. Su inteligencia superior quedaba oculta detrás de esa mirada esquiva, de ese gesto de perro apaleado. Todavía me parece verlo sentado en el último banco, junto a la ventana lindera al patio de cemento, tomando nota de cuánto escuchaba en las clases. Lejos de burlarnos de él, simplemente lo ignorábamos. También algunos profesores.
Sin embargo, a poco de terminar el ciclo ‘84, Enrique Gastaldo, Teniente Retirado y ahora profesor de Formación Moral y Cívica, se dedicó a él:
―Santamaría –le dijo desde el frente ―ya estamos terminando el curso. Y todavía no te escuché decir una palabra. Tus
Gastaldo hizo una paunotas son buenas, pero acá todos participan. Esa es la regla.sa y se golpeó el pecho con el dedo índice. «Mi regla», repitió, un poco más alto, girando la cabeza para que lo escucháramos todos. Pero Rodrigo siguió con la vista fija las hojas de su carpeta, ignorando a quien fuera, por aquellos años, uno de los profesores más temidos del Colegio. Casi tan temido como el Padre Juan, el Director.
―¿Me escuchás, pibe? ¿O estoy hablando con la pared?
Rodrigo no contestó. En el aula se hizo un murmullo denso, un presagio de catástrofe. Gastaldo, cada vez más molesto, se abrió paso entre nosotros, llegó hasta el último banco, apoyó una mano sobre la carpeta de Rodrigo y con la otra levantó el mentón del chico, que de golpe quedó mirándolo a los ojos, con la cabeza hacia atrás.
―¿Sos mudo, vos? Por lo visto, sos mudo.
La cabeza de Rodrigo parecía un juguete en la mano enorme de Gastaldo.
―Entonces, Santamaría, vamos a hacer lo siguiente. Mañana no entrás si no venís con tu padre. ¿Está claro? Tendrá que hablar él, ya que sos mudo.
―Rodrigo no tiene padres, Profesor. Ahora vive con el abuelo ―dijo uno de la primera fila.
―¡No me digan! –chilló Gastaldo, mientras soltaba con violencia el mentón del chico ―¡Pobrecito! ¿No tenés ni papá ni mamá, Santamaría?¿Nada?
Rodrigo no contestó. Volvió a mirar su carpeta.
―En fin, Santamaría –lo sobró Gastaldo-, lo que tengas o no tengas no es asunto mío. Pero mañana venís con alguien, o no entrás. Tu abuelito o quién sea. ¿Fui claro?
―Su abuelo está enfermo, profesor. No creo que venga –arriesgó el Colorado, que siempre andaba opinando sobre todo.
―¿Ah si? ¿Está enfermo abuelito? Y díganme una cosa, Santamaría, ¿también está enfermo? ¿Está mal de la cabeza? ¿Será autista, Santamaría? ¡Yo creo, señores, que éste es un rebelde que se hace el tonto! ¡Y ya van a ver lo que les pasa a los rebeldes! ¡Yo les voy a enseñar, a ustedes, cómo se cura a los rebeldes!
Algunos empezaron a desear que la escena terminara. Sobre todo el Conejo, que parecía ser el único amigo de Santamaría. A menudo pasaba a buscarlo por la casa y caminaban juntos al Colegio. Era con el único que conversaba.
―Déjelo Profesor. Ya le hizo bastante –arriesgó, entonces, el Conejo.
―Él es así, un poco especial –me animé yo.
Y fue peor. Porque al escucharme Gastaldo soltó una carcajada atronadora y se puso todavía más rojo. De la frente le nacieron unas gotitas brillantes, y empezó a meterse el índice entre cuello y el nudo de la corbata, como buscando aire.
―¿Así que sos especial, Rodrigo? ¡Mirá vos, che! ¡Un especial! Atención, señores: ¡Tenemos un especial en clase!
Esta vez nadie acotó nada.
―¡Yo les digo, señores, que en este país hubo muy pocos especiales! ¡Muy pocos! ¡Especial fue el General San Martin! ¡Especial fue Sarmiento! ¡Especiales fueron los soldados que dieron su vida por la Patria! ¡Ellos fueron especiales! ¡No una manga de tontos que se hacen los rebeldes! ¿A dónde va nuestro país, con jóvenes como ustedes? ¿Eh, Santamaría? ¿Vos que opinás? ¿Dónde vamos a parar?
Gastaldo se había inclinado hasta casi pegarse al cuerpo de Rodrigo, que apenas atinó a levantar la vista y a mirar a un costado, buscando la cara protectora del Conejo. Pero Gastaldo ya no iba a detenerse.
―Yo te voy a dar, especial –dijo de golpe, apretando los dientes ―Yo te voy a dar…
El pibe se la vio venir. Dio un soplido y se refugió contra la pared, cubriéndose con el hombro izquierdo. Gastaldo, de un tirón, lo puso de pie, y arrastrándolo de un brazo lo llevó al frente. El cuerpo desgarbado, flameante de Rodrigo, hizo volar en el camino varias carpetas y lapiceras que se desparramaron por el piso.
―¡Te lo juro, especial! –bramó Gastaldo, mientras señalaba, con el mentón, el crucifijo que colgaba encima de la pizarra ―¡Te lo juro, por Él, que hoy vas a hablar en clase!
Entonces ocurrió el descontrol, el único que recuerdo en una clase de Formación Moral y Cívica. El aula se volvió un loquero. Algunos, alborotados, saltamos sobre nuestros asientos y empezamos a los gritos. Otros arrojaban cosas a la cabeza del pobre Santamaría.
―¡Rodriiiiiigo! ¡Rodriiiiiiigo! –nos burlamos, en coro.
El chico siguió mudo, revoleando sus ojitos nerviosos. Temblaba y soplaba como un cordero.
―¡Que haaaaable! ¡Que haaaaable!
―¡Decí algo, carajo, o te la vas a ver conmigo! ¿Tenés idea quién soy? ¿Tenés idea? –gruñió Gastaldo, mientras lo agarraba del saco y volvía a sacudirlo, empujado por nuestros gritos.
―¡Hablá, Santamaría! –le gritó el Conejo. Aunque ese grito sonó como una súplica.
Y fue entonces que Rodrigo, el especial, el autista, aquella mañana del 84’, en medio de un caos general y para sorpresa de todos, levantó la vista, miró a Gastaldo, tomó aire. Y habló.
«Tenés idea quién soy yo», había preguntado el viejo. Y después de eso Rodrigó habló, no más de medio minuto, para que un silencio espantoso y total invadiera el aula. Todos nos dejamos caer en los bancos, sin dar crédito a lo que habíamos escuchado. Gastaldo dio unos pasitos atrás y apoyó el culo en el escritorio, visiblemente aturdido. Vi que el Conejo, con los codos apoyados en el pupitre, era el único que sonreía. Rodrigo lo miró de reojo, giró sobre los talones y fue a sentarse otra vez a su banco.
No podría recordar más detalles de esta historia. Sí recuerdo, en cambio, que Rodrigo terminó la secundaria en otra escuela de la zona. Después hizo Ingeniería y se fue a vivir a España. Hoy Gastaldo sigue apareciéndose por ahí, preguntando si lo recuerdan, como si uno pudiese olvidarlo, no saber quién es. Lo que Santamaría dijo sobre sus padres nunca pudo comprobarse, aunque nadie del Colegio se molestó en desmentirlo. Simplemente, no volvió a hablarse del asunto.
Primer premio en Concurso Anual Internacional de Relatos Revista Crepúsculo, 2008.
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